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Small skirmishes in the quest for financial peace

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Habits are really difficult to break. On Sunday, J and I were perusing through the Sunday paper, when I came across a sale paper for an electronics store and noticed some interesting gadget. I pointed it out and started a conversation about it. Some switch in his brain was switched on and immediately he asked “Do you want it?”. I hoped that his initial reaction was just old habits dying hard, but after a few more minutes he said “I can go get it for you”. I’m sure he meant right that moment. Here it is Tuesday, and I don’t even remember what this thing was, but I do remember it was in about the $100 range. I think it was Wii related, but I can’t be too sure. The Wii is one of those items we just had to have, now it sits gathering dust because neither of us have the time or energy to pull it out. I’m a stay at home mom with a toddler, and infant, and I’m a graduate student. He works full time and has also been delivering pizzas at night for extra cash. Now maybe I’m crazy, but when you’re working two jobs to get your debt paid down, perhaps impulse purchases aren’t the best thing. In the end, I didn’t have to say no, just said that if he felt we wanted it, we’d need to cash flow for it instead of going out and buying it. He seemed to understand.

J uses money to show affection. I use it as a form of therapy. We’re a recipe for disaster, if you’ll pardon the cliche. Once you’ve come to rely on money- ie debt, it’s hard to change those behaviors, because, fundamentally, you have to change YOU. I keep forward thinking in 2 years when we’ll be debt free except the house. My hunch is that we’ll have less stress, and less need to use money to show affection, and not need therapy! We’ll be able to focus on our marriage, our grieving, and our healing instead of spiraling debt. Now that I have an idea of what life could be like, I start to want that for others I care about. It’s so wonderful, I want everyone to have it. I feel the same way about following Christ. I would love nothing more for everyone I love to follow Christ, but it just isn’t something you can force on people. I can however, live my life in order to open up the doors for conversations. God and Christ have given me such a peace with the death of my child. To Them I give all the glory for those who wish or need such a peace.

The changes in my financial life are due to Financial Peace, which is based on the Biblical teachings of finances. Why our churches, for the most part, choose not to address the financial live of their members, I don’t know. Perhaps they think it too intrusive to talk about finances. It’s uncomfortable to talk about, and might even lead to people leaving a church, however, I don’t think this is an adequate excuse. Rarely is the right thing to say the easy thing to say. We’ve becomes consumers of Christianity in the US. We want to go to church, sit for an hour, feel good when we come out and not think again about our Spiritual lives again until next Sunday morning. Financial Peace is a component of Spirituality. Churches should be teaching it, to discourage their members from debt, and to encourage them to have faith in God concerning their titheing and charitable donations. The Bible tells us that God wants our First Fruits. That’s off the top folks. He gets our best, not what’s left over. Not what we can scrounge out of the bottom of our purses before the offering plate is passed around. It should be deliberate. This is why charitable contributions are at the top of Dave’s budgeting forms. Even as a Christian, I am tempted to give less, and months I give in to that temptation, I can tell the difference in my life. Hands that are open to give are also open to receive. Honestly, J and I aren’t at the 10% we’d like to be at for our charitable donations. We are at 5%, however, it feels really good to be able to know that there is a set aside amount in our budget to give away. This month, our donation went to The Compassionate Friends, a non-profit organization for grieving parents. Next month, it’ll be for the Ronald McDonald House, where we lived for months when our daughter was in intensive care. Such organizations do not survive without charitable donations.

I grew up in the church, and don’t remember a single sermon on money. The Bible is packed full on financial teachings and ways to succeed financially. If you are a Christian, why not take a look at them? Dave says that after reading the book of Proverbs, you’re almost read for a degree in finances. It is indeed a great book. I’m on my 3rd reading of it. It’s 31 chapters, making it perfect for once a month readings. With the economy in shambles, I think more churches might take on teaching finances from the Biblical perspective. I’m fortunate to have been led to a church who does teach finances. I’ve been thinking about starting an FPU in the community outside the safety of the walls of my church.

For those who aren’t Christians, it doesn’t mean that you can- or shouldn’t – take the common sense approach to finances. You can- and should give regularly. You should run from debt. I haven’t read it, but I believe that Dave’s Total Money Makeover is less focused on the spiritual and more on the common sense. Regardless, it takes stick-to-it-ness. Recognizing and changing behaviors. Small victories win the war.

November 18, 2008 | Filed Under Dave Ramsey Financial Freedom, Financial Freedom Journey Pep Talk, Financial Goals 

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