My grandmother died on the 2nd of this month.  She was a child of the Great Depression.  She grew learning to live with nothing.  She never had a credit card, but did do the old Southern thing of extending credit at stores.  She had credit for gas, for groceries, for her furniture, as was the way of life in small towns.  When going through her papers after she died, I did find a credit rejection from Ford Motor Company when she was co-signing a loan for a cousin that was taking advantage of her unwillingness to say no.  My grandparents had been living on nothing but my grandfathers social insecurity for years.  I imagine that the rejection was devastating and embarrassing for her.  She was raised in a very different financial age when people just didn’t borrow huge sums of money and commit to 5 years of repayment.  Perhaps she kept that rejection letter for a reminder. She died with nothing.  She sold her house years ago and spent it on nothing, and the aforementioned cousin all too willing to take advantage of her.  To my knowledge, I don’t think she ever had a savings account.

I’ve been turned down for credit plenty of times.  It’s no big deal to me.  I can do it in the privacy of my own home, taking off the sting.  Growing up, my mother bought everything on credit cards- groceries included.  More than a couple of times we were standing in the check-out line in Wal-Mart with enough groceries to keep four teenagers fed for a week, and the credit card was denied.  I was humiliated as we had to walk out of the store, everyone staring at our abandoned carts.  From that I learned not to rely on credit cards.  I use debit cards, and the few times my card has been rejected, it’s often been due to bank errors -satellites down, or what ever reason.  Once I was in the drive through for Starbucks and my card was rejected, and I was mortified.  It was probably my first clue that all was not well with our financial picture.  But sweet J was stupidly trying to create a financial picture to make me happy.  I have to confess that I was drinking STBX once, sometimes twice a week, and buying milk for me then 1 year old on top of it.  I was easily spending $75 a week at STBX.  I don’t even want to do the math.  I’ve matured so much financially in that one year, actually since starting Financial Peace in June.  Now when I crave STBX I do Dave math in my head.

When my grandmother died, I didn’t have to worry about where we were going to get the money to travel 900 miles to Alabama.  I had my emergency fund, but I also had my blow fund.  This is where I put J’s tip money.  We still weren’t able to afford to fly down, and had to live for 4 days traveling in our car, but now we don’t have to chose which bills won’t get paid next month.  This is on top of additional Christmas spending, which has been more excessive than I’d like to admit, but I am learning.  I’m being an example to my children.  I’m teaching them the use money wisely, to save for emergencies, not to be reliant on credit cards, and never need to be humiliated or embarrassed because of their financial situation.  I am living- learning- and teaching.  Financial Peace.

Why oh why do I fall away from what I know works? It doesn’t require copious amounts of energy. But what’s comfortable, or “the way I’ve always done it” is hard to let go of, even if it is making us miserable. I know, it doesn’t make an ounce of sense. Before Financial Peace, I was not so blissfully ignorant of how better my financial life could be. I assumed it would be hard to be responsible. The truth is that it is in fact so simple that my ignorance is hard to swallow when I must confess to irresponsible financial behavior. Less stress is the result when you have an accurate and truthful screen capture of your financial life. It is hard to let go of the bad financial habits. We are absolutely light years of where we were when our minister first said the words “Financial Peace” in a sermon last January. Now at least I know better and have a little disappointment- even shame- when I don’t name every single one of the dollars in our income and outgo. I know now that I can blow all my hard work in one shopping trip, and that shopping trip might make the difference in how long it takes us to break free from Financial Peace. Dollars that are being frittered away because of poor planning aren’t going to pay down off our dept.

I hate balancing the checkbook. I hate paying bills (if you do like it, you’re weird). I spend more energy dreading doing the tasks than it requires to do them, and since starting Financial Peace, it’s never as bad as I feared. I’ve been conditioned to think the worse. But the truth is that the lessons really are sinking in, and one day of less than perfect (not necessarily bad) choices doesn’t throw it all away. I’ve just got to break the budget forms out again and sit down and have our budget committee meetings. We need a Financial Peace Check-up. It’s been our 3 months (actually a little less )or 30k miles.

There are a number of ways to get back on track. The easiest for me is to go to Dave’s website and do some reading. Today I read of How to Become a Stress-Free Shopper. There’s nothing new learned because the steps to Financial Peace are consistent and Biblically based. It isn’t a gimic, or membership dues. In fact, it is possible to take Dave’s advice for free. Check the books out from the library, download the budgeting forms for free. His radio shows and TV show is also free. The FPU course is reasonable, and it’s a lifetime membership. It’s necessary for hard heads like me to have accountability. I can’t begin to quantify the stress that we’ve let go of since making the commitment to start the program. I’m grateful that now, with Dave’s help, I have the common sense to know when I’m making bad decisions and can be responsible and accountable to my self. I have the fundamentals that are important to our financial plan, and must be in place in order for us to obtain Financial Peace. How long it takes us to get there is dependent on how well we stick to our plan.

~Manda

17 He who loves pleasure will become poor;
whoever loves wine and oil will never be rich.

This verse in Proverbs doesn’t expressly explain will those who love rich will become poor, but it can be studied and applied to several scenarios. In the context of Financial Peace, I believe that we can safely infer that someone who spends all his money on things that gratify him will not obtain Financial Peace. Dave says over and over that a mature adult delays gratification, children do what feel good. We’re a country of poor people because we love pleasure. We see it, we want it, we get it. So what if we can’t afford it.

Our very economy is based on borrowing. Debt is our National Product. What would happen to our economy if everyone quit loving pleasure, and bought things that they could afford with cash. According to the book of Proverbs, we would be a rich nation. Driving home tonight I heard on WTOP News (although I can’t find a link to it and couldn’t write it down), that the ultimate cost of this bailout will be more than all previous major government purchases and bailouts (Lousianna Purchase, New Deal.. etc) combined, even factoring in inflation. Yowzaa. The bailout is to keep stimulating our economy, so that… we can continue to borrow. So that we the Government can continue to be our master. Debt indentures you to your creditor.

Proverbs 22: 7b

and the borrower is servant to the lender.

When does the Government run out of money?

To continue the Proverbs lesson:

Proverbs 11:5
He who puts up security for another will surely suffer,
but whoever refuses to strike hands in pledge is safe.

Proverbs 17:18
A man lacking in judgment strikes hands in pledge and puts up security for his neighbor.

Proverbs 22:26-27
26 Do not be a man who strikes hands in pledge
or puts up security for debts;
27 if you lack the means to pay,
your very bed will be snatched from under you.

Security in today’s context is credit. In Financial Peace, Dave gives the generational evolution of how credit in the country. Henry Ford gave no credit in his lifetime, but now the auto industry is now holding out its hand. Our economy is broken beyond repair. Those who have given credit will suffer Proverbs said. The government has designated industries that “can’t fail”. They can’t fail, to complete the cycle, because the Government needs to keep the country in a state of servitude.

The truth is that the country can survive without debt, because it has. Only in the last 2 generations has the country become reliant on credit. Our grandparents thought debt was stupid. Our great grandparents were embarrassed and ashamed of debt. Our country now relies on it, to the point that we borrow from the citizens in order to pay the industries so that the citizens can borrow {?!?}. We freak out when we can’t gladly pay you on Tuesday for a hamburger today (apologies to Wimpy). Perhaps not in our lifetime, but even perhaps during our lifetime, these “can’t fail” industries can fail, or in the vary least must be reformed into an industry that we no longer recognize. We should work diligently to break free from their indenture and obtain Financial Peace and the Freedom that comes with it.

On this Thanksgiving Day, I’m thankful that God led me to Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace, and I’m happy that I can live as an example (of not only what to do right, but the struggle, and what can go wrong), and that hopefully, one day, I’ll no longer be indentured to my debtors and I can work in order to help those willing to rip up their contracts, and break free.

~Manda

J and I are working on keeping our Christmas at a bare minimum this year. Our children won’t go without because we have parents who overspend during Christmas, ignoring all practical financial advice. We’re working as examples to them and hope one day that we can bring them over to the peaceful side of finances.

The first mistake, Not Prioritizing, sort of hits a little about what I talked about in my last post. Dave suggests you differentiate between what HAS to be done, and what is just fluff. Holidays aren’t fun if you’re stressed out. Realized from the onset what is important, which is also his 10th mistake Forgetting Why We Celebrate. Family, friends, loved ones are more important than the material things.

The mistakes between 1 and 10 are Dave’s every day principles that have been translated into the holiday setting : make a list, make a budget, shop around, using credit cards. Number 4 Buying for Everyone is a common mistake. I’ve done it. In the past I’ve bought for my husbands nieces and nephews that don’t even know my name, and I’m hard pressed to remember theirs. Dave’s suggestions are to talk to people at work about drawing names for a gift. In the past, I’ve been in workplaces that do a month long secret Santa that really added up. In the current economic client, I’m doubt this behavior will decrease, and that spending limits for gifts will be decreased. For the past 3 years I’ve gotten to know a group of mothers in an on-line community, and exchanging Christmas gifts was part of the norm. This year, only 2 mothers signed up to participate. $30 is a lot to spend on a child not even your own. The decision was made to instead have an ornament exchange with a $5 limit. Before you get stressed out about the holiday, and you undo the hard work you’ve done in financial peace, stick to what you’ve learned and talk to family members and co-workers about realistic expectations. This economic crisis is not limited to a few, chance are, your friends and family members will welcome the suggestion.

So far, J and I are doing pretty well in our Christmas spending. I took all of our change buckets to the local Coinstar and got free coin counting because I redeemed my change for Amazon ecertificates. Until December 7, you can get a $10 bonus when you redeem more than $40. I just need to find my receipt and send it in. Before FPU, I wouldn’t have worried about losing “free money”, but now I really see the missed opportunity. J is working a 2nd job delivering pizza at night, and we’ve earmarked that money for Christmas, however, our hope is that we won’t use it and will make another big loan payment after the New Year.

Make a Christmas shopping plan and stick with it. Use all you’ve learned in FPU. Don’t use your credit cards at 18% interest to buy gifts for everyone you know. Make a list and stick to it. Shop sales. Study store flyers before going out so you know who has the best deal. Take sales papers with you to stores that price match. We live in a town with a handful of Wal-Marts. If you know that an item is cheaper at the Wal-Mart on the other side of town, be vocal about it and you’ll get the cheaper price. Stores want your business. I think Circuit City might be having some good deals because they declared bankruptcy and are facing closing their stores. I worry about shopping there because if their doors are closed, where do you take your returns?

When all else fails, bake something, make something, send a thoughtful handwritten card. I’m making a lot of gifts this year. I’m making my mother and mother-in-law a scrapbook. It really is the thought that counts.

~Manda

When we first started FPU, we talked briefly about selling our van, and then made excuses, plans, about how we could keep it. We still believed the great American myth that “everyone NEEDS a car payment”. We didn’t totally accept this as a lie until another couple in our FPU class sold their Lexus. Reading about Financial Peace, and being a first hand witness to Financial Peace are two different things. This is one of the reasons I suggest that even if you believe that you can’t afford the $93 to take FPU, that you sell something and get involved. There’s no promise that you’ll have the same source of motivation, but the class will be filled with people, just like you, from whom you can garner support. It’s hard doing it alone. The doing isn’t so hard. Maintaining focus and motivation is what’s hard, for me, especially after the first few weeks when you plateau.

We are wonderfully made social people by God. Yes, Financial Peace has a religious component to it without shoving religion down your throat. Even if you aren’t religious, the Bible contains smart common sense about money. Proverbs alone contains mountains of financial advice, particularly about not being a surety (cosigner of a loan). Proverbs 11:15 says that “One who hates being surety is secure”. Being at stay at home mom, I have plenty of time to watch Judge shows on TV, granted my 2 year old doesn’t have other plans. Most, if not all of these “small claims” concern defaulted loans. Don’t loan out money. If you are in the position to be giving out money, give it. Do a good deed without expecting anything in return. If you can’t give out the money without taking out credit, or being a surety, don’t. If asked why, tell them that God tells you that being a surety isn’t a good idea. Dave uses a verse in Proverbs (22:7) to illustrate the relationship once money is lent… “the borrower is servant to the lender”. Think it’s silly, have you ever owed anyone money? Has anyone ever borrowed money from you? It puts a strain on the relationship. At our onset of FPU, our van was nearly repoed. My MIL got a loan to keep the van out of repossession. We could have kept the van and made payments to her, but I did not want to be her slave. We sold it and got out from underneath the remaining debt as quickly as we could.

Financial Peace University gives you a syllabus of finances in the Bible. God doesn’t want you to be in debt. Why? Because it creates stress. Someone that I look to as a mentor is going through a very tough time in her marriage right now. It’s been hard for me because it has been reflective of my own past problems. There are a lot of differences between the two, but the primary is that she and her husband don’t have the debt adding the extra dimension of stress to her marriage. She’s able to focus of God and her husband and her family in order to heal. Financial Peace University gives you partners that- whether intentional or not- whether they know it or not- encourage you, to “comfort and edify each other” as 1 Thessalonians 5:11 offers.

I’ve written a couple of times about the couple on FPU group that attacked their debt with gazelle intensity. This is the same couple that we modeled our behavior after they sold their vehicle. I could see the physical difference in them just in the freedom from that debt, and it motivated me to do the same. I’m happy to write that last weekend, they became debt free. They’re going to try to call the Dave Ramsey show tomorrow and scream that “They’re debt free”, so listen out for them. If there is a local FPU meeting in your area, go, get role models and peers in the same situation as you, with the same motivation as you, and the same goal as you. If you don’t find someone with which you can compare, perhaps you can serve as the good example in your class. There are too many reasons to go to FPU, I can’t even begin to enumerate them here. But, I hope that my successful experience is just one of the reasons to go. I couldn’t have done it without the 14 weeks of accountability we received at FPU.

~Manda

As I listened, I tried to pay attention for something for which to write about for my last post of the month. In lesson 4, dumping debt, Dave says that he knows that he can often identify callers who “have it”, and those that don’t. Those that “have it” are angry, and ready to get out of debt. They find no excuses, have no reason to delay it. They get on board, and they get on board quickly. I would be one of these callers. J would not. He’s a bit more inclined to not own up to things right away. He needs to be knocked around a bit before he sees things accurately, which is why we’re a perfect match. For every bully, there is a wimp.

Our Baby Emergency Fund has a little gremlin that we call Dave Murphy. Any time it gets funded, something happens, and he takes all the money out. We’re 4 months into our Financial Peace journey, and are back to Baby Step 1.. re-again. We’ve had 2 yard sales, we’ve sold a jet ski, cut out our retirement, sold our van, gone to the bare bones for insurance, cut out trash service. We’re still holding onto our cable services. I’m in my final semester of my graduate degree, and internet service is a necessity for us at the moment based on our circumstances. But we have to dig deeper. We have to find a way to get it funded again. We’ve been trying to sell our hot tub, and hopefully, since hot tub weather is nearly here, it will sell. So, I’m going to cut the price again, and all but give the thing away to get our Baby Emergency Fund re-re-funded.

J has a meeting with the manager of the local Domino’s tomorrow. He’s to take in his driving record, and we suspect he’ll be hired on the spot. That will certainly help in getting it funded. We’re also looking to sell Jason’s truck to knock out the 8k debt, leaving us with only one left from the medical bills of our daughter.  My comprehensive exams are next week, and once that is over, I’m going to see about getting a job at Kohl’s as a seasonal employee.  We’re starting to prepare for July. In July, my student loans will come a knockin’. My girls will definitely not graduate from college in debt. Through FPU, I’ve learned about ESA’s, and as soon as we complete Baby Step 3, we’re going to start funding these college funds. Current law allows a 2k year contribution. Our oldest is 2, which seems awful young, but each year we aren’t contributing is a year that her fund will miss out on the compounded interest that would make the 2k per year starting at age 0 until age 18 nearly 200k. There are many steps to get from here to there, but it is important to keep an ear to the ground to be ready, to have a game plan.

One thing that Dave said in the same lesson about those that are going to “make it” is that when your broke friends are making fun of you, you know that you’re doing it right. Some family members have been a little worried, accusing us of joining a cult and such, but I guess I have great taste in friends, because my broke friends are checking out Dave’s books, they’re funding emergency funds. I’m such a convert, so determined to get out of debt as soon as possible, that I’m going to be co-teaching FPU starting in November. It’s offered through my church, but anyone can attend. The next session is going to start on the tail end of a sermon series on debt- in anticipation of the holidays. It is my hope and prayer that my broke friends will join me at least for the FPU. It’s the best $93 I’ve ever spent. 10 years from now when I’ve changed my family tree, and I’m giving like no one else, in the memory of my daughter, I’ll be even more thankful of the small investment. After I’ve co-taught a lesson, then I’ll start teaching my own FPU courses. The lessons learned during the 14 weeks don’t end at the 14 weeks. After listening to the DVD’s (which come with the $93), I’ve learned more, and I know that as I do the course as an instructor, I’ll learn even more. J and I are a bit deficient in the life insurance part. I have none. Nada. Zip. What he has is what is offered at work.

Very quickly, before I close, in speaking of the Holiday’s, I noticed that the Coinstar at our grocery store doesn’t charge if you get an Amazon,com gift certificate from your coins. So, we’re emptying Piggy Banks. We got… ha… $93 out of one. No trips to the mall. It eliminates impulse purchases, and “gotta have its”. We’ve got 2 more to empty so that we can go get plastic stuff for our kids.

The last thing that I re-heard, not for the first time, but I was like “Oh yeah”, was that Prayer really does work. It does. It does. I’ve no doubt that God led me to Dave Ramsey’s program because I prayed for help with finances. If there are any two people that are a testimony to how much things can change in 14 short weeks, it is us. I can’t even begin to tell you of the denial that I was living in, and of the lengths J was going to hide it from me. After 14 weeks, J and I are caught up on our bills, and are working with one another, not against one another. More importantly, is that Jason has become a Christian. The promise and the proof that he was seeing after doing it God’s way, not only financially, but in every aspect of our lives was the evidence he needed.

~Manda

This morning, J told his boss that he’d be unable to go. We’re okay with it. We were very excited about it 6 months ago, planned the trips we would take while in the San Diego area. But now we’re more excited about the opportunity to be debt free in 2 years. We can’t throw away all the lessons learned in the last 13 weeks for a trip that, as those striving for Financial Peace, those doing what rich people do, can’t afford. If I’m honest, we’re quite proud of our decision. We’re delaying instant gratification and instead walking the path of Financial Peace.

We’re living like no one else, so that later, we can live like no one else [and take a trip to San Diego that we pay for with cash!]

~Manda

One of the reasons that J and I are excited to acheive Financial Peace and to build wealth is that one day, I know that I am going to be responsible for the finances of my parents. My mother works to pay her credit card debt and car payment. My dad is going to seek retirement soon, and I assume my mother will keep working. They’ve worked hard over the years, but they will not be able to retire with the dignity that two such hard working people deserve. Hopefully, when the time comes, I’ll be able to give them that dignity. I’d like to help my dad pay off their home. They live in rural Alabama and have very little left on it. Then I’d like to have my dad pay “rent” into a savings account and invest that money for them on top of his military retirement and social insecurity. The hard part will be to get my mother to start spending money instead of credit. But hopefully, I can use our Financial Peace Journey as a motivator. I believe that as Christians, we are called to take care of our family. The Bible tells us in 1Tim 5:8 that even unbelievers take care of their family, and to not do so, makes us less than an unbeliever. It is that important, and something I take seriously. I’ve always known that it will be my responsibility to care for my parents when they get older. I’ve just had no idea how I would be able to do it. With Financial Peace, it becomes possible. With Financial Peace, taking the God-given responsibility of caring for my parents will not be a burden on top of many other burdens. It will be a pleasure because I’m no longer dealing with life as it comes. I’m thinking forward, taking responsibility for my actions and decisions, and being mature enough to delay gratification.

On the flip side, I hope to build our wealth to change our family tree. I know that if I am diligent and continue to apply the principles taught in Financial Peace, and continue to pray for the guidance of God in our lives, that my children will be able to go to college, and will be able to start their first jobs newly educated and debt free. I want to raise them to be responsible with money so that they will make mature decisions about the wealth that J and I will build over the years. In changing our family tree, my daughters will be responsible for us and our money, but in managing it, and not providing for us.

Preparing for the senior years of our parents, and changing our family tree are but a few of the examples of what we’re looking forward to through Financial Peace. We’d also like to build Accessible Playgrounds in memory of the infant daughter, Aleah, who died 18 months ago. Looking forward to giving is exciting. But, it means living the lessons that we’ve learned. We’ve already planned to listen to the CD’s on our trip this weekend, to re-motivate, to remember, to not lose our focus. Even if we stopped with baby step 2, the positive impact Dave Ramsey and Financial Peace has had on our life is remarkable. I’m happy to report that we have a balanced check book! I know that this is minor stuff for some, but it’s been 5 years for us. All of our bills, with the exception of our trash service, are caught up, and it will be paid in full on the 25th.

It’s tempting at this point to cut back our titheing in order to have the extra cash flow to pay down some debt, but after hashing that decision out in my head, I know, in my heart, that titheing is an important component of my spiritual life. It’s me showing God that I trust him with my finances. He led me to my church, which in turn led me to Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace. I know that God blesses those that have Faith in him and “put aside” for his glory. In our case, it may not be a financial blessing, but I think that the change in my marriage over this process can be a testament of the blessings God has promised us in exchange for our giving. I’ve always believed that giving is an important part of Christianity that is often overlooked. J and I missed the last FPU lesson on giving, but I’m excited to hear it this weekend during our road trip.

As Mona said earlier in the month, quitting is not an option. I understand that some may get discouraged because Baby Step 2 takes so long, especially if there is a lot of debt. Even for those who pay their debt with no intensity are better off if they stick with the resolve to QUIT BORROWING, because that is a step in the right direction. No matter how quickly or slowly you travel, having the proper orientation, although basic, gets you to your destination. Christmas is just right around the corner, and J and I have absolutely no money budgeted for it. None. We aren’t willing to go back into debt this year, and spend the first few months of the New Year recovering. But, I trust that it will be a joyous holiday regardless.

~Manda

Regardless of your FICO score, in order to achieve Financial Peace; QUIT BORROWING. We live in a society of instant gratification. We have a sense of entitlement. We work hard, we need big houses, big televisions, designer clothing, cell phones that have manuals thicker than the phone book of my home town (Marion, Alabama,) and a new car every few years. Count the number of commercials for cash advances, title loans, check cashing… etc. In case you didn’t know, these loans are a BAD idea, no matter what the “emergency” is. These commercials have women with shopping bags talking about sales that couldn’t be missed, young couples waving fistsfull of cash while driving off in a car from the title pawn saying “We even got to keep our car”. Guess what. You just pawned your car. It’s now THEIR car until you repay the loan. The interest rates that these places charge are criminal, and more often than not, you will struggle to pay it back, or you will lose the car. It will NOT be worth it. Payday loans work the same way. Additional loans are needed to pay off the first loans. Quit borrowing. No matter what society, or some marketing team tells you: you can not borrow your way out of debt.

The most alarming to me is cashcall.com. The “whatchu talking about Willis” former child star is crying that he tried to auction his clothes, and even his car, but then Cash Call gave him the money he needed. The rates on these loans are ridiculous, and vary from state to state. The way to stop this kind of indebtedness, is to #1 QUIT BORROWING, and #2, use common sense. As a resident of Virginia, to borrow $1,500 from cashcall.com, after the “loan fee” of $500, I’d walk away with 1k. After 12 months of monthly installments of $159.83 for a total of $1917.96, nearly 100% of the amount I walked away with. If I were to borrow $2600, the loan fee goes down to a mere $75 but I’m paying $216 a month for three and a half years. My total repayment would be $9095,10. The premise of the commercial is that poor Gary Coleman needed to sell his stuff to get money. Despite the message, that’s exactly what he should do! Calling cash call is the dumbest thing that could be done. Even if I needed this loan to keep my lights from being cut off, I’m paying them the equivalent to a light bill for the next 3.5 years, putting myself in additional financial stress for the next 3.5 years. I’m just extending my financial burdens. If you’re getting these loans to buy something you can’t afford, think about what you could have afforded. Think long term.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. When your finally desperate enough you will quit borrowing. QUIT BORROWING. But, they’re going to repo my car. Sell it, don’t title pawn. Sell it for blue book. They’re going to take me to court and get a judgment and destroy my credit. Okay. Since you’re not borrowing anymore, my FICO doesn’t matter to me. Being a mature adult means delaying gratification, being responsible for the consequences of my bad decisions, and making restitution. Continuing to make bad financial decisions isn’t going to save me from a judgment in the future. It will only prolong financial stresses which branch out into every aspect of my life. Ever laid in bed at night and worried about money? In the shower? Do you get a pit in your stomach when you check the mail, or screen calls because you’re tired of talking to collectors? Get out of it. Quit borrowing. Save 1,000 in cash for “emergencies”. Pay yourself first. Pay for your shelter, food, utilities, and transportation. If there is any left over, pay your unsecured debt using the debt snowball. You can not borrow your way out of debt. No matter how cute the commercials, it will only cost you more in the long run. Cut your lifestyle and live your wage.

You can not borrow your way out of debt.

You can not borrow your way out of debt.

You must make hard, common sense choices to get free of the debt you’ve incurred. After you’ve quit making excuses, rationalizing and making the decision to quit borrowing, reevaluate your lifestyle. What about all those necessities you can’t live without? If you’re serious about getting out of debt, if you’re tired of the stress that comes along with being in such debt, you’ll live without them. Go to the bare bones. Turn off the cable, do you need a land line and a cell phone? Cut down your groceries and buy generics. Don’t eat out. Don’t eat out. Don’t eat out. Cut all unnecessary spending. Starbucks got way too much of my money. Turn down invitations to birthday parties. Lunchbag it at work. Don’t eat out. Get a 2nd job or work overtime. Have a yard sale. Sell something. Come up with the money before you borrow more. You can not borrow your way out of debt. In the end, you have to make the decision either to keep living a lifestyle you can’t afford, and borrowing, or to live your wage, pay off your debts, and be free from these financial burdens. It isn’t forever. In fact, Dave estimates that it takes about 2 years for people to pay off their debt. Wow. 2 years of bare bones living or 5, 10, 15, 20, a lifetime of living in debt.

~Manda

I try to watch The Dave Ramsey Show on Fox Business as often as I can. If I could only watch 1 day, it would be Friday’s. Callers call in on Debt Free Friday’s and share their stories and scream “I’M DEBT FREE”. Dave probably won’t receive a call from us, because I haven’t the patience to try keep dialing, however, the shows are motivational.

Tonight Dave said that:

Part of achieving any goal is being willing to say no to things that are going to keep you from achieving [that goal].

It takes maturity to say no and discipline to keep saying no. Today I had the opportunity to practice several of the tips that J and I have gathered from our weeks at FPU. We have our cash flow plan (what we now call our budget), and if it isn’t “cash flowed”, it isn’t bought. If we NEED it, it comes out of the emergency fund. I have to plan to go to get my haircut. We’re planning for him to go to the men’s retreat at church. I got an email from Old Navy today that there is a Baby Sale. The kids NEED fall and winter clothes. I love on-line shopping. We’ve been so good, you see where I’m going with this. I was making excuses to fill that virtual shopping cart. So, I called Jason and had him talk me down. In the past, we’ve been enablers, but he said that we could go to Old Navy- cash in hand, if I still wanted to do so…. tomorrow. Now that the urge is past, I’m absolutely content to sit and wait until next week’s consignment sale. My kids have way too many clothes anyway. Clothes that typically goes unworn, although there is never a lack of laundry to fold.

I’m learning power over purchases through: maturity, discipline, a written cash flow plan, and seeking the counsel of my spouse[if you aren't married, Dave suggests getting an accountability partner]- all lessons that I have learned through the weeks during FPU. It’s nothing magical, even Dave says it. It isn’t remarkable. I’m sure there are people out there who know this stuff without Dave, but I suspect that most of us are the average American who wasn’t born wealthy; we believe that we’ll never have it if we wait until we can pay for it with cash. We believe that credit card debt is a necessary evil in our lives, or that we’ll always have a car payment.

This week will be our last week of Financial Peace. When we started we were behind in our mortgage, possibly facing foreclosure. One of our vehicles went into repossession. We had no communication in our marriage and J was struggling to hide our true financial situation with us. Deep down, I knew we were living beyond our means. It would have been simple to pull our credit reports, or even check our mailbox from time to time, but the truth is, I was scared to do so, and willing to let him struggle, all the while, self- righteously blaming him for the problems I’d help create. Sure, the death of our daughter and her medical bills played a big part of what we owed, but in the end, it doesn’t matter how we got in debt, just that we are in debt.

Our marriage was close to an end, and it is so hard to look back to that couple 13 weeks ago and realize that it was us. We’ve gotten rid of both of our vehicles and now drive two Dave Cars that have only liability insurance. We’re caught up on our bills. We have a written plan and we follow it. I don’t buy things that we don’t need, even when I convince myself that I NEED it. I know that it isn’t forever. We continue to tithe to our church, which is a big deal to us as Christians, and that feels good. Prayer really does work. I believe God led us to our church, we came to FPU through our church. So much has happened in the last 13 weeks that I can only imagine the wealth and peace that we will have in 13 years.

~Manda